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| humor
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|---|---|
My dog stopped digging after i told him he's just gonna end up in china. | true |
'dirty dancing' was a safe-abortion champion wrapped in a rom-com bow | false |
What do you call a slutty clown? the town unicycle. | true |
Why did the energizer bunny go to prison? he was charged with battery. | true |
What does a chinese restaurant serve for easter? coloured eggrolls! | true |
Tomorrow is erection day for all the asian-americans. | true |
What is hairy and between your grandma's nipples? her vagina | true |
I was in the shower when i had a miscarriage. worst baby shower ever. | true |
Food safety: 5 things in your kitchen that could make you sick | false |
Favorite all time cooking shows: 1. iron chef 2. hell's kitchen 3. breaking bad | true |
Dijon vu the feeling you've eaten this mustard before. | true |
If you're ugly, you cant say single and loving it cuz you really have no choice. | true |
The seahawks are going to the super bowl! | false |
I've been waking up with a headache for years unfortunately i'm married to it. | true |
What does a cannibal do after dumping their girlfriend? they wipe, flush, and wash their hands | true |
Kristen stewart wears a bra-top on the red carpet (photos, poll) | false |
It is possible to fix your credit in two months | false |
Patton oswalt: daniel tosh criticism can be 'dangerous' | false |
What do you get if king kong sits on your piano? a flat note. | true |
Terry mcauliffe defends hillary clinton's 'dead broke' comment | false |
How's that hope and change working out for me? just fine, thanks. | false |
A blind man walks into a bar... ... a table, and a chair. | true |
Yes, you can cancel cable and still keep hbo | false |
These impressive kid fashion designers will blow you away | false |
What's the most eco friendly subreddit? /r/jokes because over 90% is recycled garbage. | true |
Gun violence and women: moving beyond the headlines | false |
Baby wallaby kicks well-meaning kayaker in the head during sea rescue | false |
What is the one thing you don't want to hear during sex? honey, i'm home! | true |
Cpac attendees' inappropriate behavior prompts apology from convention center | false |
Q: what goes krab krab krab? - a: a dog barking in a mirror. | true |
How to deal with wedding guests who don't rsvp on time | false |
Cinefantastique's here's what's going on: the man behind despicable me 2's minions | false |
What kind of cake is even worse than fruitcake? bukkake. | true |
Top gop lawmaker: 'i wish democrats would help' look into russian election meddling | false |
What did lewis and clark only have one sack of on their expedition? jawea | true |
Obama hangs with the golden state warriors at the white house | false |
Lebron got video of the world cup final pitch invader | false |
Holiday decorations: little tips to make your home festive and bright | false |
'harry potter and the cursed child' is officially coming to broadway next spring | false |
Wang jun, artist, spends one month on a scale to lose weight | false |
A priest walks into a bar.. he looks around and leaves disappointed. everyone is over 18. | true |
Maymo the beagle can't find the biscuits under the bucket | false |
Another entry in the files of 'jennifer lopez is better at dubsmash than you' | false |
America's most affordable housing markets: 24/7 wall st. | false |
Blended family friday: meet amy and eric's family | false |
The lexington new york city -- old new york meets new new york | false |
How many vietnam vets does it take to screw in a lightbulb? you weren't there man!! - shorty | true |
What aspect of the game do women soccer players like most? getting that good d | true |
What do you call a slutty a gun? a fl-uzi | true |
Paul wallich, vermont dad, builds helicopter drone to follow his son to the bus stop | false |
North korea warns of 'super-mighty preemptive strike' as u.s. weighs next move | false |
Exploring a new city? here are four reasons to hit the dog park | false |
'a wrinkle in time' has a grand imagination, but it can't quite put it to good use | false |
I prepared the chicken earlier. i said, listen, there's no easy way to say this... | true |
Chris brown's new song to include gay-friendly message in connection with singer's 'unity campaign' | false |
'real housewives' divorce: adrienne maloof and paul nassif resolve divorce | false |
Legally blind single mother living on $21,000 is just grateful to finally have a turkey this year | false |
What do the sixth sense and titanic have in common? icy dead people. | true |
When you ask your waiter for an extra pickle, don't wink. it can easily be misinterpreted. | true |
I've been doing home repairs. since i started using black caulk, i haven't gone back. | true |
I like my internet like i dislike my women. not going down on me. | true |
Kendrick lamar, tde crew release short documentary chronicling concerts and rappers' beginnings | false |
Hunter spanjer, 3-year-old deaf boy, told by preschool to change way he signs his name (video) | false |
Why were the native americans here first... ...because they had reservations. | true |
What do you call a dentist gunfighter? clean teathstwood. | true |
What did obi-wan kenobi say to the guy at the liquor store? only a sith deals in absolut. | true |
How our reality show president is changing the way politics and culture mix | false |
An open letter to attorney general jeff sessions, from a fellow alabamian | false |
Why did the m&m 's go to college? because they wanted to be smarties. | true |
This gay erotica is helping j.k. rowling laugh about brexit's 'terrible mess' | false |
Watch highlights from the last gop debate before iowa | false |
The bottle said to apply liberally so i bitched and complained the whole time i used it. | true |
?when the moon hits your eye? you'll be killed. it's massive. | true |
What was so great about being a black jew? they already thought you were burnt | true |
Style tips from virgin atlantic's runway magazine (photos) | false |
These scones are so good, you'll wish you were british | false |
Why did adele leave the house? so she could say hello from the outside. | true |
Words hurt the other day an n-word hit me over the head with a tire iron. | true |
How do you know when your best friend is gay? his dick tastes like shit. | true |
Why don't they let whales into strip clubs? they tend to humpback. | true |
College basketball coaches, adidas exec charged in kickback scheme | false |
What do you call a heavy toilet? el ton john. | true |
What did donald trump say to the guy who immolated himself in front of trump tower? you're fired! | true |
Your selfie would be way better if you weren't in it. | true |
It's been 300 days since the al jazeera journalists were jailed in egypt | false |
What is the difference between me and my couch? my couch pulls outs | true |
Up votes are a bit like my sex life. it doesn't happen. | true |
Defiant donald trump vows he will 'never' drop out of the race | false |
Watch: woman allegedly posed as sheriff, rammed other car in road rage | false |
I think police forgot which organized group of white dudes with shaved heads they are. | true |
Heard this one at the bar last night: women are good for 70 things... making sandwiches and 69. | true |
Ending wildlife trafficking will help the fight against terrorism | false |
The top three healthy holiday eating tips (video) | false |
I once had a small part in a porn movie. it was cold that day. | true |
Anyone else able to tie rope using telekinesis? thought knot. | true |
To get to the other side why did the time traveler cross the road? | true |
My wife was shocked when she found out i switched her vibrator with a taser. | true |
Earhart plane debris may have been found on ocean floor | false |
Never underestimate a woman's ability to make anything your fault. | true |
What's the difference between a chef and a gay guy? a chef doesn't stir yesterday's food. | true |
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